Moving on

Even at the age of 19, life has thrown many challenges my way. Some I can cope well better then others and there’s just some situations where I break down and cry. Which is normal I guess but it’s about how you move on from a challenge, that shows growth of character.

When something doesn’t go to plan or goes wrong , I am ready to cry or have a tantrum or just get flustered and irritated which therefore as a human causes me to shut down. I start to worry and think the worse of myself. “It’s always me ! Nothing can ever work out for me” – I definitely scream that. The feeling in my stomach is horrible , filled with so much pain.

I’ve always assumed I had a problem, until I realised I’ve never been the problem and it’s other people, who get me in this mood are the problem. I do understand I’m more emotional then some people but if there’s a sense of clarity to what’s going on and a solution to how we are not going to end up back with the same problem. Then I will be fine.

However what may work for me and provide me with comfort, doesn’t always work or isn’t always understood by another person. Which is also fine , I just have to communicate that. Nonetheless, I’ve always felt that , coming up with a solution to problems was normal. The people I’ve engaged with, have apparently taught me that wanting to talk about every issue and coming up with a solution is just “long” and “unrealistic”.

Those words make me feel childish. Here I am with a solution to move on and then they just get written off.

Moving on is such a personal experience, trauma or experience that has happened in your past will affect your ability to move on effectively and efficiently. You could cancel plans and that person wouldn’t be affected whatsoever, however some people (me) can be so distraught they cry. Sounds silly but it’s a real thing. Moving on from being let down has been a real challenge due to the fact that it’s something that constantly happens. You’d think I’d be used to it by now-nope!

What I do to move on and cope :

I have a poster of mechanisms for example yoga or writing poetry. Or if none of them work I just embrace it and continue on with life. Usually tend to stay away from the people , or just know not to believe them all the time. Despite this learning to give people a second chance and just moving on can benefit both people in a situation, they might not want to talk about it because for them it brings up bad thoughts or memories. Learning to forgive and forget is also a massive step towards moving on, the relief you feel once you do.

Moving on is hard , just as everything else in life.